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The Westons' neighbor, Charley Dietz, is established as a lazy, skirt-chasing mooch right from the start, dropping in regularly to swipe food from Harry's kitchen and never missing an opportunity to insult Carol (who sees him as a worthless, disgusting sex maniac).
Charley spends the majority of his time chasing women and pursuing meaningless relationships. A frequent visitor to places such as Crotch Dusters and Stiffy's, his sleezy tactics and lack of respect for women often land him in hot water. He occasionally receives death threat and once even a voodoo doll likeness of himself. None of this, though, puts a damper on his sex drive, for he never fails to find a willing date somewhere. And if he does happen to find himself in a dating slump, he'll try out new off-the-wall techniques to pick up women. Some of these include posing as a doctor, putting subliminal messages onto cassette tapes, adopting a foreign accent, posing nude for an art class and even using Dreyfuss as a ladies magnet. A few times, Charley does show a softer side and even falls in love. Unfortunately, every time this happens, the relationship somehow comes to an end.
Charley works on a cruise ship called the Ocean Queen, although he rarely seems to be away. No one is exactly sure what he does on the ship, but his duties do include carrying around keys and passing out shuffleboard pucks. Over the years, he does attempt a couple different careers. He takes a job as a pirate at Pirate World, becomes a television weatherman, works with his brother at a used car lot and even tries stand-up comedy, which leads to an appearance on Evening at the Improv. When these career changes falter, he somehow ends up back at his cruise ship job. "I just showed up," he says. "They never knew I was gone."
The product of an unloving family (his parents don't hide the fact that they favor his younger brother Deiter), Charley sees the Westons as his family and Harry his father figure. At times a mature, responsible Charley does surface. He even proposes to Carol when she gets pregnant without a husband. During season seven, Charley finds out that he is the father of a 17-year-old boy. Of course, at first he parties with the boy but soon sees the error of his ways and shapes up. Alas, these responsible spells are only temporary, and he's soon up to his old tricks again.
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